February 8, 2022
Is it a societal thing? I’m not sure. I’ll sit at my desk look at nothing substantial but my mind is racing looking for something. Wanting to be productive, enlightened....better.
Just do it they say. But there is a level of mental exhaustion that stops me from pushing myself further. Am I mentally weak? Or have I engrained the hustle culture so much into my system, it’s driving me to a point where I’m over extending myself.
I want to be something.
I want to make something.
I don’t want to be forgotten.
Is that a purposeful drive? Is that an unhealthy mission?
I need to understand what doing for me looks like. But how can I do that if I don’t know who me is? Where is the internal validation that will push me? It’s somewhere, but it’s really hard to find.